2020

This photo about sums up 2020! This morning I woke up and did the same thing I do every morning, I got my morning drink, showered, turned on my podcast and began the two hour routine I have begun to embrace since the pandemic. The title of the podcast was, "The Year In Good News" It was The Daily podcast, a New York Times daily podcast that does short daily news briefs, just enough to keep me informed, but not to much to make me worry or think to hard about the world news right now. Todays particular story was a special in which they interviewed people asking them what their good news was for 2020 and it got me to thinking, what about this year has been good for me and I honest to goodness struggled most of the day trying to put together a list of the highlights. This year for me has been the biggest shit show. I have struggled more, been disappointed more and wondered honestly how anything was going to get put back together. If I am being completely honest, which I promised myself I would when I started this blog, I am still not sure of my footing, I still have a ways to go, and I keep telling myself 2021 will be great! But don't we always tell ourselves, just wait till next year, or tomorrow I will start on that diet, Next week, I promise I will tackle that to do list. For many reasons, very personal ones, I will not go into the details, but will say this year for me had me tackeling things I never thought I would face, put people in front of me that I never imagined would be the ones to pick me up when I was falling, and gave me the courage to literally keep my head above water when I thought for sure I was going to drown. When listening to the people on this podcast tell of their triumphs this year, I realized, I am still breathing, I still have a roof over my head, and I am able to get up on Christmas morning, hold onto my children and give them presents that I bought for them because I still have my job. I was reminded that I need not in 2021, not tomorrow, not next week, but right now see the good in what I do have, which far outweights many people around me. The pandemic was not the story to all my problems this year, while it has not been ideal for us, it has forced me to look at the way I spend my time, how I manage all the resources we already have in our home,to entertain ourselves,to cook more, how we handle ourselves financially and what the long term looks like for us with our jobs. What is truly important as far as stuff, what is really required to make us happy versus what we think we need to be happy! All that being said, I am trying to make a difference right now, this moment. The past several mornings as I visit with some of my friends, I have hung up and realized all I did was complain, talk about all the things that are irritating me, the list of things I have to get done, and not once did I say, how are you? I hope that you have a great day and thank you for visiting with me, thank you for listening to me. I realized I not only shared my little pitty party, but must have brought everyone else down with me. We are responsible for our own well being and I am going to make sure I take care of mine and the ones I love around me as well! I know that I can't resolve all the worlds problems in one day, or even my own, but I can certainly make an effort. I also promise to not beat myself up and give up if I fumble along the way. We do not arrive in the places we are in over night, so I will not expect to wake up first thing and all will be right with the world, but I am going to, this second, remind myself, that I alone am in control of choosing how I manage my day! Someone very dear said to me the other day, just let your light shine bright, and that is what I am going to do today, and as much as I can everyday, let my light shine and hopefully everyone around me will feel it too! Thank you for the beautiful advise, you know who you are, and thank you for always listening to me. I think 2021 requires a new club, one with good vibes and no bitching allowed! Maybe we can make it more than 24 hours this time!!!!